RE: Party political broadcasts
Dear Political Parties,
I felt I must write this open letter to you as a matter of utmost urgency and concern regarding your party political broadcasts.
After conducting thorough research with 20 half-sozzled mates down my local, I have to tell you that your chances of wooing them and me through these 'sermons' is practically zero percent.
In fact, I don't know whether you're aware of it but all you're doing is boosting the viewing figures for Home & Away.
Also, there's no point getting 'celebrities' on either because, quite frankly, we see enough of Alex Ferguson as it is. We don't need them grinning at us while we're trying to eat our dinner.
I've seen David Cameron's kitchen enough times now to be able to tell you where he got his tiles from, what his kids eat for breakfast and what type of washing up liquid they prefer.
And while we're at it; Tony Blair and Gordon Brown sharing a black cab? Who are you trying to kid? It's taken all their energy over the past 10 years not to appear on Neighbours From Hell.
So do us a favour please, let us watch our dinners in peace. After a busy day at the office, the last thing I want is to be forced to get up from the table and switch over just as I'm about to tuck into my bangers and mash.
I trust you will henceforth get those nice people at the BBC and ITV to move them to the pre 10pm news slot.
By that time, I for one would be quite grateful of something to get me to sleep quickly.
Yours etc..
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